Africanized Killer Bees arrive in Orange County!

Now I have been hearing that the killer bees were on their way here since 1980, and I must say: those warnings were rather frightening to an eight year old. It would seem that everyone forgot all about them over the last 10 years...everyone except the bees, who were slowly making their way here. To little fanfare, they attacked last week. Nobody noticed, except for this small blurb in the Orange County Register. According to this article, they've been here since 1999. I had no idea.

Wednesday, August 18, 2004 Santa Ana bees were Africanized

Thousands of bees that boiled from a massive hive in Santa Ana last week were Africanized bees, state tests showed.

State agricultural officials performed DNA tests on the bees, which stung more than a dozen people after children threw rocks at their hive in an apartment building wall. A four-block area was cordoned off Aug. 12 while firefighters doused the estimated 120,000 bees with water. Bee exterminators followed up later.
Orange County was declared fully colonized by Africanized bees in 1999. County Agricultural Commissioner Rick LaFever said the bees' DNA is checked only after multiple-sting incidents. Africanized strains are more aggressive than domestic bees.

– Pat Brennan

I wonder if they eat mosquitoes.

I really hope my tax dollars didn't fund this study.

NEWPORT BEACH — One of the state's priciest cities also has the lowest percentage of residents who identify themselves as multiracial, according to a report released Friday.

As usual, registration to the LA Time website is required...free and worth every penny. Other brilliant article highlights include: "Newport Beach is an expensive place to live..." and: Glendale, at 10.1%, was the "most multiracial," according to the report. The city has a large Armenian population that checked "some other race" and wrote in "Armenian" on the census form, Johnson said.

Did anybody else know they were allowed to write in "Armenian"? These census forms really need an overhaul.

Another reason Arrested Developement is better than The OC:

The Big Yellow Joint! I was thinking I would work on the guitar chords for this brilliant song, but I need a little time away from work...and the other job.

For anybody looking to score some weed at the beach, there is no big yellow joint in Newport. Finding frozen bananas is not difficult.

From the harbormaster's office, head west up the main channel and you'll have Balboa Island on your right. Marine Avenue is the main drag of Balboa and, lined with shops and restaurants, it's notable for two dining delights: the Balboa bar and frozen bananas, both of which are said to have originated there. The Balboa bar is vanilla ice cream dipped in chocolate and then rolled in a topping of your choice, while the frozen banana is impaled on a stick and dipped in chocolate. Yum!

I'm only $5,000,000 short of the world's coolest house. If I remember later, I'll post a picture. Until then: http://www.beachcalifornia.com/sunset7.html

A towering home in Seal BeachAn 85-foot-tall former water tower, redesigned as a tri-level residence, has come on the market in Seal Beach, bordering Sunset Beach, at $5 million.The tower, part of the water system of Huntington Beach until 1975, is also being offered in trade. It was originally built in the 1800s to store water for steam engines but was rebuilt for Huntington Beach in 1945. In 1984, it was auctioned off and turned into a home.Gerald Wallace, a retired firefighter, has owned the tower for about 10 years. He refurbished it, installing electric window shades and fire sprinklers.Other features of the tower include a third-floor observation room that doubles as a movie theater and has a 25-foot-long wet bar and a 7-foot retractable table that reveals a fire pit.The tower has two bedrooms and maid's quarters in 2,200 square feet. The kitchen has a dumbwaiter. The ground floor has two-car parking, a spa, skylights and an elevator. There are views of the Pacific Ocean, Huntington Harbour and the San Gabriel River.Mike and Vanessa Colonna at Star Real Estate, Sunset Beach, have the listing.

The absolute dumbest prescription I have ever seen:
Sent via facsimile, mind you...

Norvasc 5mg #90 1 po qd refill x3

I'll leave off all the patient specific stuff for HIPAA purposes, but everything on this Rx was perfect...up until the very last line...

***CANCEL THIS PRESCRIPTION***

Why the hell did you fax it to us then???

Waitress, I would very much like a cool, refreshing glass of ice water....did I just order ice water?  Please cancel that.  I don't want water at all.  I want the complete opposite of water.  What do you have that's least like water? 

I think I have absolutely nothing to add to this...except possibly: I'm so there. 

Mike Carano is boldly going where no man has gone before.
The 38-year-old Fullerton resident is directing and producing a live stage version of an episode from the original "Star Trek" TV series. He won permission to mount the show from Paramount Pictures - which owns the rights to the ultra-lucrative sci-fi franchise and previously had never allowed the show's characters, dialogue and music to be used for a live stage show.

Stuck at work today on a rather gloomy Saturday.  Sailing instruction proved a little difficult as the Good Lord did not feel like providing any wind for 2 weeks.  But I could not have been all bad, for they invited me back to teach Capri 2 (intermediate sailing).

So I have not been too busy today, giving me time to fire off this gem (sent to Parking Services at UCI):

Dear Sir or Madame,
Parking meter number 2 at the ARC only goes up to 45 minutes. On two occasions it has continued taking my quarters without providing me with any extra time (beyond the 45 minutes). I would guess that I have wasted $1 on this meter. Additionally, I have suffered much anguish wondering if I would be ticketed due to the meter's malfunction. If meter number 2 is not repaired immediately, I will begin boycotting this parking space.
 
Back to work.

Long time no blog. Busy, busy, busy.

Tonight I made my first dollar from sailing. Or to be more correct, my first 36 dollars. At least I think I did. I'm not 100% positive that they are paying me. At any rate, I'm teaching a beginning sailing course. Capri 1, new classes starting every 2 weeks if anybody is interested. I'm exhausted and I have writer's block. Off to bed.

Much to report.

1) My haiku has paid off. I am the brand new recipient of a Plantronics Freehand Headset. I have to lock this baby up at night. Why didn't I ask for a new car?

2) I beat T-Mobile. Aside from the fact that the phone never seemed to work anywhere that I happened to be, I had no real complaints against the company...until we tried to get out. I bought a couple of phones online from AT&T, and they ended up porting our numbers 6 days early. T-Mobile hit me with a $400 early termination fee. It only took 2 phone calls, much waiting, and no yelling to get these charges removed. Anyway, more proof that you should never buy a phone just because Catherine Zeta-Jones is hot. That link might not go to a real website. I'm afraid to click it at work. My apologies if it's porn, or something.

3) I'm now worth $50 million. That's right, I've adopted a beach. It's a nice little place in the numbered streets. If anybody would like to help clean it...

My first Haiku
by Michael B. Lasko (Can you believe I'm still not in the top 10 Google searches for Michael Lasko or Michael B. Lasko?

three naked wires
fear of electrocution
good work injury

So I've been waiting for a new headset for 3 months. In protest, I decided to write a haiku. You know, just like Jack.