Tuesday, December 21, 2004

Arrested Development Drinking Game
by Michael Lasko

I'm sure there's one out there already, but I sure couldn't find it. Feel free to post any additional rules in the comments section.

Take a drink for:

1) Any bleeping (presumably covering obscenities)
2) Any reference to incest (2 drinks if not involving Maeby and George Michael)
3) Gob has sex
4) Michael has sex (4 drinks)
5) Reference to Henry Winkler being gay (I can't remember his character's name)
6) Any Fonzie reference (2 drinks)...let's make that any Happy Days reference
7) You hear the term: "Nevernude"
8) Someone other than George Michael working in Banana Stand
9) Banana stand gets damaged or destroyed (2 drinks)
10)George Sr. tries to escape from jail; 2 drinks if he's successful
11)Clip of George Sr. infomercial; 2 drinks if it's in another language
12)Gob messes up a magic trick
13)Buster gives a massage
14)Annyong says: "Annyong"
15)Lindsay asks anyone for money
16)Narrator (Ron Howard) points out some misunderstanding between family members
17)Ron Howard narrates a flashback to a previous episode; 2 drinks for everyone that misses the flashback
18)Reference to the OC (I know it's coming)
19)Any Real footage of Newport Beach

My game is probably a little long. Please let me know what you think.

Monday, December 20, 2004

After much study, I was able to block Harry Potter from my computer. Certainly, this would have been an easy feat for Netscape or Internet Explorer, but since our hard drive crash, Nico has chosen to use Firefox. Firefox has absolutely, positively no parental controls. Like I said, this took much study. Does anybody else think this is pretty funny? Nico did not...and has now found a new hobby. That's right: sock puppets.

Thursday, December 16, 2004

Hard drive crash!

Sadly, I never felt the need to back anything up. The good news is: Michael Lasko is multi-talented. (I need to type Michael Lasko a lot to ensure that I remain a top 10 Google search). For a mere $70, I replaced my own hard drive. The computer repair place, OC Computers (no joke, although they were called Irvine Computers until very recently) wanted close to $400...that did include an attempt at data recovery. My data was not worth $300. But is no more. If you've been a long time reader, you may remember my brilliant idea to host my own web page. This worked out well, except it required leaving the computer on/hard drive spinning 24/7. Anyway, since I still own the domain, I guess I'll forward it here. Unfortunately, most of my blog pictures were on that hard drive. If I can find copies, I will (slowly) put them back up.

In other OC news, tonight is the big Chrismukkah episode. I heard the yarmuklaus was sold out before the season started. In addition to work today, I've been reading about OC pop-culture references in USA Today. (Click on the annotated guide on the right for each episode). Something else I learned in USA Today: marketers have intentionally left the t out of Chrismukkah, so as not to offend us Jews.

Monday, December 06, 2004

OC Marathon Results
Run Time: 3:58:06
Gun Time: 3:59:54
Half Time: 1:53:56

Did I mention that a marathon is 26.2 miles? And it was raining. Which reminds me, if you ever run a marathon in the rain, do not wear sunglasses. After about 5 minutes, you will have absolutely no dry clothing to wipe the raindrops away. I'm pretty sure it was hailing at the finish line, but Nico says I was imagining it. But I digress.

Big PacifiCare Marathon thank-yous to the leaders of the 4 hour pace group (they caught up to me around mile 23 and gave me a half mile pep talk) and to world record holder Amy Dodson (I followed her for about 5 miles in the late teens and early twenties). Sorry that link is a little old, but for some reason, the local press was not terribly interested in a marathon runner with a prosthetic leg. Anyway, I beat her by a good 2 minutes.

8 weeks until the Huntington Beach Pacific Shoreline Marathon. Think you can't do it?

Thursday, December 02, 2004

By popular demand, my Amazon Wish List. If anybody would like to buy me the iPod Mini before Sunday, I would be most appreciative. After purchasing something for me, please pick something out for that other Michael Lasko. I think he needs a 3 year old MP3 player, and probably something for his dog, Gus. Please note: In case you did not notice there are 2 Michael Laskos with Wish Lists. I am Michael B. Lasko, and I do not want a 3 year old Mp3 player...sure they're cheaper than brand new iPods, but I already have a 3 year old MP3 player, and it doesn't work very well.

Wednesday, November 24, 2004

For those of you that don't remember, I ran my first ever marathon in February of this year. As per my entry of 3/12/05, I suffered a foot injury (a result of running a marathon in Nike running shoes), which later led to a knee injury. So for the last 8 months or so, I did pretty close to no running....until about 2 weeks ago.

Conventional wisdom says that it takes somewhere between 6 months and a year to prepare for a marathon**. I had a simple goal: get in marathon shape in 4 weeks. That's right, on December 5th, I will be running the first ever Newport Beach Marathon. I'm only up to about 15 miles so far, but I've got another 10 days. I'd like to break 4 hours again, but I feel a little slower than I did a year ago. We'll see how it goes.

**As an aside, my father says that this rule only applies to your first marathon, and that after running one you automatically are in marathon shape for at least a year. It's a nice thought, but I can't say that I've ever seen my father run...ever.

Tuesday, November 02, 2004

One of the millions of disenfranchised voters:

Over the years, I've noticed that if I vote early in the morning, there's coffee and donuts. So I wake up 45 minutes early, arrive at my polling place circa 7:00 AM, ready to do my civic duty...right behind the other 200 people with the same idea.

Excerpts of cell phone conversation after waiting in line for 45 minutes:

Me: Time off to vote?
Boss: What do you mean?
Me: I've been in line for 45 minutes, I'm almost inside.
Boss: I usually vote after work. Next election, if you want to vote before work, you should request a shift change.

Right-o. I'll write that down...request different shift in 4 years. Who the hell keeps the same job for 4 years? Was I being unreasonable? I think not:

So I get to vote after work today. I really don't even want to vote, but it gives me something to complain about for the next 4 years. Anyway, let's say there were 500 people waiting to vote when I left at 7:45 AM (when most people are at work or asleep). Anybody have a guess on how long this line will be at 5:30 PM?

But none of it really matters, because the world will soon be coming to an end...Tricia's friends have started buying me dinner. Thanks again Alex and Deanne. Come back anytime!

Thursday, September 30, 2004

The Real OC???? Is OC weekly going to start a Real OC Watch (to go along with the regular OC Watch)?

Those Orange County Register bastards stole my line:

"I think it will make us look more desirable," Kinsman said. "It could do for us what '90210' did for Beverly Hills. It will glamorize Laguna Beach."

Username: takealotofdrugs
Password: takealotofdrugs

Wednesday, September 22, 2004

Ooh Baby, It's a Wild World. I think I am most fascinated by the fact that Yusuf Islam founded a Muslim school called, "Islamia". Is it named Islamia after it's founder (Islam) or because of what they study (presumably: Islam)? It boggles the mind. Anyway, so long Cat. We'll miss you, buddy.

Cat Stevens to be deported after jet diversion
WASHINGTON (AP) — Homeland Security officials said Yusuf Islam — formerly known as singer Cat Stevens — will be deported Wednesday after being denied entry to the U.S. Stevens had recently been placed on a government "no-fly" list after U.S. authorities received information indicating associations with potential terrorists, a government official said.

Sunday, September 12, 2004

So Nico and I drove down to Dana Point today for the Tall Ships Festival. I was looking forward to touring Spike Africa (AKA: The Tweedle Dee from Joe Vs. the Volcano). Unfortunately, there was absolutely, positively no Spike Africa amongst the numeous ships. Here's a Picture of me steering The Spirit of Dana Point (I think):

Google has not cached my page in months, and I'm no longer searchable at all under: "sailing, tandeming, drugs." You Google people have gotten lazy, now that you're all billionaires. In other news: I've dropped out of the top 10 on Yahoo for the term: "big yellow joint".

My point in all of this is that I have been attempting to court the wrong demographic. I need old people with lots of money to visit my page, and donate to the boat fund>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

And what could be better bait than Bobby Darin? That's right, Bobby Darin is making the news again as the subject of a new Kevin Spacey movie. In addition to playing the title character (and singing), Spacey has written, directed and produced this movie. If you don't know who Bobby Darin is, try being 50 years older (or watch A&E biography more often).

Wednesday, August 18, 2004

Africanized Killer Bees arrive in Orange County!

Now I have been hearing that the killer bees were on their way here since 1980, and I must say: those warnings were rather frightening to an eight year old. It would seem that everyone forgot all about them over the last 10 years...everyone except the bees, who were slowly making their way here. To little fanfare, they attacked last week. Nobody noticed, except for this small blurb in the Orange County Register. According to this article, they've been here since 1999. I had no idea.

Wednesday, August 18, 2004 Santa Ana bees were Africanized

Thousands of bees that boiled from a massive hive in Santa Ana last week were Africanized bees, state tests showed.

State agricultural officials performed DNA tests on the bees, which stung more than a dozen people after children threw rocks at their hive in an apartment building wall. A four-block area was cordoned off Aug. 12 while firefighters doused the estimated 120,000 bees with water. Bee exterminators followed up later.
Orange County was declared fully colonized by Africanized bees in 1999. County Agricultural Commissioner Rick LaFever said the bees' DNA is checked only after multiple-sting incidents. Africanized strains are more aggressive than domestic bees.

– Pat Brennan

I wonder if they eat mosquitoes.

Saturday, August 14, 2004

I really hope my tax dollars didn't fund this study.

NEWPORT BEACH — One of the state's priciest cities also has the lowest percentage of residents who identify themselves as multiracial, according to a report released Friday.

As usual, registration to the LA Time website is and worth every penny. Other brilliant article highlights include: "Newport Beach is an expensive place to live..." and: Glendale, at 10.1%, was the "most multiracial," according to the report. The city has a large Armenian population that checked "some other race" and wrote in "Armenian" on the census form, Johnson said.

Did anybody else know they were allowed to write in "Armenian"? These census forms really need an overhaul.

Monday, August 02, 2004

I'm only $5,000,000 short of the world's coolest house. If I remember later, I'll post a picture. Until then:

A towering home in Seal BeachAn 85-foot-tall former water tower, redesigned as a tri-level residence, has come on the market in Seal Beach, bordering Sunset Beach, at $5 million.The tower, part of the water system of Huntington Beach until 1975, is also being offered in trade. It was originally built in the 1800s to store water for steam engines but was rebuilt for Huntington Beach in 1945. In 1984, it was auctioned off and turned into a home.Gerald Wallace, a retired firefighter, has owned the tower for about 10 years. He refurbished it, installing electric window shades and fire sprinklers.Other features of the tower include a third-floor observation room that doubles as a movie theater and has a 25-foot-long wet bar and a 7-foot retractable table that reveals a fire pit.The tower has two bedrooms and maid's quarters in 2,200 square feet. The kitchen has a dumbwaiter. The ground floor has two-car parking, a spa, skylights and an elevator. There are views of the Pacific Ocean, Huntington Harbour and the San Gabriel River.Mike and Vanessa Colonna at Star Real Estate, Sunset Beach, have the listing.

Wednesday, July 28, 2004

The absolute dumbest prescription I have ever seen:
Sent via facsimile, mind you...

Norvasc 5mg #90 1 po qd refill x3

I'll leave off all the patient specific stuff for HIPAA purposes, but everything on this Rx was perfect...up until the very last line...


Why the hell did you fax it to us then???

Waitress, I would very much like a cool, refreshing glass of ice water....did I just order ice water?  Please cancel that.  I don't want water at all.  I want the complete opposite of water.  What do you have that's least like water? 
I think I have absolutely nothing to add to this...except possibly: I'm so there. 

Mike Carano is boldly going where no man has gone before.
The 38-year-old Fullerton resident is directing and producing a live stage version of an episode from the original "Star Trek" TV series. He won permission to mount the show from Paramount Pictures - which owns the rights to the ultra-lucrative sci-fi franchise and previously had never allowed the show's characters, dialogue and music to be used for a live stage show.

Saturday, July 24, 2004

Stuck at work today on a rather gloomy Saturday.  Sailing instruction proved a little difficult as the Good Lord did not feel like providing any wind for 2 weeks.  But I could not have been all bad, for they invited me back to teach Capri 2 (intermediate sailing).

So I have not been too busy today, giving me time to fire off this gem (sent to Parking Services at UCI):

Dear Sir or Madame,
Parking meter number 2 at the ARC only goes up to 45 minutes. On two occasions it has continued taking my quarters without providing me with any extra time (beyond the 45 minutes). I would guess that I have wasted $1 on this meter. Additionally, I have suffered much anguish wondering if I would be ticketed due to the meter's malfunction. If meter number 2 is not repaired immediately, I will begin boycotting this parking space.

Back to work.

Monday, July 12, 2004

Long time no blog. Busy, busy, busy.

Tonight I made my first dollar from sailing. Or to be more correct, my first 36 dollars. At least I think I did. I'm not 100% positive that they are paying me. At any rate, I'm teaching a beginning sailing course. Capri 1, new classes starting every 2 weeks if anybody is interested. I'm exhausted and I have writer's block. Off to bed.

Wednesday, May 26, 2004

Much to report.

1) My haiku has paid off. I am the brand new recipient of a Plantronics Freehand Headset. I have to lock this baby up at night. Why didn't I ask for a new car?

2) I beat T-Mobile. Aside from the fact that the phone never seemed to work anywhere that I happened to be, I had no real complaints against the company...until we tried to get out. I bought a couple of phones online from AT&T, and they ended up porting our numbers 6 days early. T-Mobile hit me with a $400 early termination fee. It only took 2 phone calls, much waiting, and no yelling to get these charges removed. Anyway, more proof that you should never buy a phone just because Catherine Zeta-Jones is hot. That link might not go to a real website. I'm afraid to click it at work. My apologies if it's porn, or something.

3) I'm now worth $50 million. That's right, I've adopted a beach. It's a nice little place in the numbered streets. If anybody would like to help clean it...

Friday, May 21, 2004

My first Haiku
by Michael B. Lasko (Can you believe I'm still not in the top 10 Google searches for Michael Lasko or Michael B. Lasko?

three naked wires
fear of electrocution
good work injury

So I've been waiting for a new headset for 3 months. In protest, I decided to write a haiku. You know, just like Jack.

Tuesday, May 18, 2004

Nothing on TV tonight, so I was watching Blind Date reruns. Best place to take a date? Brennan's Pub. That's right: Turtle races. How can you beat turtle racing? If you can't wait to get out to the pub, try clicking here. Turtle #3 is the money turtle. I've been studying his habits.

Monday, May 17, 2004

I feel like my best friend is moving away.

WEST NEWPORT -- The city's resident bad boy, Dennis Rodman, is trading his beachfront party pad — which sold Thursday for $3.8 million — as well as his wild reputation, for a more mild, family-oriented lifestyle.

Sorry again about the required login. The Times is free and worth every penny. But if you would like a synopsis: Rodman hasn't had a drink in 6 months and his house went for more than expected because Rodman lived there. People are nuts.

Tuesday, May 11, 2004

One time, I was sailing a Shields....(may this never happen to me)

Fishing boat runs aground
Neighbors get an early wake-up call when a vessel crashes into rocks below their homes. No one was seriously hurt.

Sorry if you have to sign in to the LA Times website. It's free, but the picture tells the story.

Monday, May 10, 2004

Everybody and their mother.

Afternoon tea in Newport Beach. My nephew was there with his mother. My sister with her mother. My wife and her mother. My sister-in-law and her mother. My other sister-in-law and her mother. Lest I forget my brother-in-law and his mother. A few fathers here and there. Perhaps I've double counted a couple of mothers. I think the South Africans were troubled that tea was served at 2PM instead of the traditional 4PM.

On a technical note, I'm quite certain that I don't care for the new blogger format. Anybody have any suggestions?

Saturday, May 08, 2004

Has it been three weeks already? Time flys when you're...well I'm at work today, and time is not flying. Not much new, except that Nico has finally made it over the hill. That's right: the big four-oh. You read it here....on the internet. It must be true.

In sailing news: here are some pictures of the beginning sailing class I'm assisting. If you don't feel like looking through the 80 or so pictures, here's one of me (aboard a Boston Whaler) serving as rescue boat for a capsized Capri 14.2. (or is that Catalina 14.2?)

In other sailing news: Shields racing starts this Wednesday. So far, Wedensday night is a UCI only event as the South Shore Yacht Club is apparently going bankrupt. Please donate to the boat fund; when I've raised $90,000, I promise to buy a boat and join the South Shore Yacht club with any monies left over. (Providing they still exist).

Sunday, April 18, 2004

Capri racing today...or more correctly Catalina 14.2 racing. (It's a long story). Nico and I were the first place co-ed team. I must say, Capris are much more difficult to sail than Lido 14s. But enough about sailing. Blog traffic has fallen off recently. Only one thing (other than Quizno's Sponge Monkeys) can pick things up again: Uma Thurman. That's right Uma Thurman pictures. I have finally figured out how to post pictures on this thing. What better way to start off than with Uma Thurman pictures? Sorry, Uma Thurman is not nude, but she is holding a priceless Hattori Hanzo sword.
Anybody seen Kill Bill Vol. 2? Super Cool.

Wednesday, April 14, 2004

I had no idea!!!!

There's more:
Anti-Union Negotiating Tactics
Rx Solution’s (Rx) immediate
agenda was to destroy the support for
PACE. At the first meeting they
demanded transfer of 20% of the unit
jobs to a non-union facility 90 miles
away. Many of the affected included
top union supporters.
Rx also has refused Union Security
clauses, Union Leave, and Seniority
They insist on retaining their Merit
Pay System.
They want to subcontract bargaining
work at management discretion, even
allowing supervisors to do any and
all bargaining unit work.

Incidentally, I happen to like merit pay. I guess I never was cut out for that union stuff.
Today's Latin lesson:

Signed up for Capri racing today. The online form asks for University affiliation. All the graduates always fill in "alumni"...obviously incorrect as it's plural. As I am no longer staff, I went with "alum" (instead of my usual "alumnus"). Nico had to do one better: "alumna". I think she had help from

On to the Latin lesson:

alum: An alumna or alumnus.

alumna: A woman graduate or former student of a school, college, or university. (plural=alumnae)

alumnus: A male graduate or former student of a school, college, or university. (pluarl=alumni).

Usage Note: Alumnus and alumna both come from Latin and preserve Latin plurals. Alumnus is a masculine noun whose plural is alumni, and alumna is a feminine noun whose plural is alumnae. Coeducational institutions usually use alumni for graduates of both sexes. But those who object to masculine forms in such cases may prefer the phrase alumni and alumnae or the form alumnae/i, which is the choice of many women's colleges that have begun to admit men.

Thursday, April 01, 2004

Still recovering from the last marathon (Dr. Foot says I have a neuroma), I had resigned myself to not doing anymore distance running. And then here I am at work...working along and I get this email delivered to my Inbox:

PacifiCare is excited to announce its sponsorship of the first annual OC Marathon, taking place Sunday, December 5, 2004.

The 26.2 mile course is tentatively scheduled to begin at Fashion Island in Newport Beach, with the scenic route continuing through Irvine to the Spectrum and finishing at the Newport Dunes via the Back Bay. The course will provide a fast-paced tour of Orange County, showcasing both its history and beautiful scenery...

Seeing as how my boss is telling me to run, if I further injure my foot, is it a work injury? Anyway, I have it penciled in...anybody want to run with me? It's just like the Huntington Beach Marathon, only you don't have to worry about being mugged...oh, except for that part in Irvine.
This year's resignation letter (Sent to my boss and co-workers via email):

It is with great pleasure that I tender my resignation, effective immediately. I will soon be fulfilling my lifelong dream of opening a floating ice cream parlor/soda fountain on Newport Harbor. (Something similar to Forbes Island in San Francisco). If funding allows, I also plan on including a small pharmacy in the back. If any of you are interested, I will be needing a few good employees on both the ice cream and pharmacy ends.

Wednesday, March 31, 2004

Hey, did anybody catch my street on the OC tonight? Line of the week (also the line most likely to tick off the Anti-Defamation League) belonged to Summer: "I can out Jew you."

Monday, March 29, 2004

Long time no see.

I spent yesterday volunteering my sailing skills to Access To Sailing. (If you don't feel like clicking the link, it's a non-profit that provides sailing opportunities to the disabled). For some reason, I get a strange vibe from them whenever there are no disabled persons around. For instance, their flagship ship is named "Zij Naplno" (Czech for "Live to the fullest") and the two directors have young Czech girlfriends. Were they dontated along with the boat? One of them seems to live the prime 60' Shoreline Village dock provided free by the City of Long Beach. Altruism is dead.

Friday, March 12, 2004

Still recovering from last month's marathon, I finally went to see my doctor today Re: a broken bone in my foot. My doctor dislikes me strongly, and made me sit through this story about the very first marathoner before providing any treatment:

The modern Athens Marathon commemorates the run of the soldier Pheidippides from a battlefield at the site of the town of Marathon, Greece, to Athens in 490 B.C., bringing news of a Greek victory over the Persians. Legend has it that Pheidippides delivered the momentous message "Niki!" ("victory"), then collapsed and died, thereby setting a precedent for dramatic conclusions to the marathon.

As I figured, the x-rays were negative, although he thinks I have a small break that was not visible. No running for 6 weeks.

Thursday, March 11, 2004

Well this whole Quizno's thing was certainly fun. My Blog went from 3 readers per day to over 100. I am a little surprised at how few people made it over to my webpage. How can anybody resist reading a page called Sure it's not very interesting...but I pay $8 a year for that name. Some traffic would be nice.

In recent news: I made an unsuccessful run for both President of the United States and California State Assembly (68th district) on the Libertarian ticket. I think if Nico had written me in for State Assembly, I would have won the nomination. Maybe if I campaign a little harder next time...

Sunday, February 29, 2004

I realize I said I was not going to write about the Sponge I won't. Evidently, I had another typo: They are really called Spong Monkeys (or maybe it's one work: Spongmonkeys). I guess it's supposed to rhyme with pong. I have no idea what that means. But anyway, I've had a few requests to make my guitar tab a little clearer. Feel free to email me with any corrections. If you like my tab, please donate to the boat fund>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

E.......A ......B................E
..............We love the subs
..............Subs are a dollar off
When you bring in coupon
..........................For things to eat or oil changes
or pony rides or for hairplugs
................Any coupon works
Beware of paper cuts
The Quizno Subs

I play the chords like this
E A B C#
-- -- -- --
-- -- -- --
-- -- -- --

Hopefully, this will be my last Spong Monkey entry. Here is a neat marketing lesson: Also, believe it or not, there is some classic marketing strategy going on here. As others have pointed out, this spot—unlike shock-spots with, say, flatulent horses—actually centers on product attributes. We're told that Quiznos subs are tasty, crunchy, warm, and toasted. We're introduced to the concept of the pepper bar, which one imagines is a bar stocked with a menagerie of peppers. (Not really my thing, but still, a selling point of sorts.)

Saturday, February 28, 2004

All Sponge Monkeys, all the time.

After days and days of research (hey, it's been raining here) I have figured out what those Quiznos guys are: tarsiers!
Image Hosted by

Nico has moved past the "What the hell was that phase, and found me a new Quiznos ad. Okay, this topic has run a little long. Next time I'll write about something else. Oooh, we're going tandeming. Irvine? I hope nobody steals our rims.

Thursday, February 26, 2004

Quiznos Monkeys revisited.

So I've been working on the guitar chords for the Quiznos commericals [Yes, I am aware that I spelled commercials wrong, but that typo is brining me all my Google traffic, so I can't change it now]. (As an aside, does anybody know if it's Quiznos or Quizno's? Looks like I have been typing both). Anyway, Quiznos people: please don't sue me. I would be more than happy to perform this in a commercial. I can sing almost as well as the Sponge Monkeys, and I'm just as funny looking. So here's the guitar tab (3 low strings only; I hope this lines up right):





I'm having trouble fitting the words in. I don't think it matters much where you sing them. Loud and high pitched is the important part. What better way to annoy the Mrs?

Wednesday, February 25, 2004

Those singing Quizno's monkeys.

I think the Quiznos press release sums it up better than I can: The new creative campaign is completely unexpected…even for Quiznos. “The first time you see the advertisement, you might ask yourself, “What exactly was that?” Our intent was to grab the consumers’ attention. By the second time you see it, we guarantee you’ll be singing along,” said Quiznos Chief Marketing Officer, Trey Hall.

Nico, who thinks they're mice, or something, is still in the "What the hell was that?" phase. I however, have moved on to singing along...I tried searching for the guitar chords, but instead found this cool pre-Quiznos thing.

Friday, February 13, 2004

As of this minute, I have become a web server; after many hours of labour, I am hosting my own web page. Most difficult was getting both and to work. (Well, maybe I haven't been successful at that yet). Also, I've added frames, which I was never able to do with geocities. Still needing work: the double frame that appears when you click the link from the page to the blog, followed by clicking the link from the blog back to the webpage. If anybody has any suggestions, please let me know. Next up, this page is going to move to the new server as well. Did I mention that I have had absolutely no training?

Wednesday, February 11, 2004

The things you can do with DSL: Some of you may remember the penguin game that I used to pass the time (instead of working) at Crescent. But dear God, they had these 10 year old e-machines. Now that I have DSL, I can play this much better penguin game. Brought to you by mi amigo George. Well sort of, mostly he does Japanimation. But I somehow found this on his site amongst the Japanimation. Other neat things on his site: the Tweedledee. Or maybe that was from someone else, but it was the Joe V. Volcano thing that got me looking for it.
DSL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can now blog like, 80 times faster. When I figure out how, I am going to start hosting my own blog. If anybody has any pointers, I'll take them.

Thursday, February 05, 2004

Some marathon updates: I was wrong, I'll never be able to beat Minh Thai at anything. I did finish ahead of Minh Chai. Such is life. Here are my official times:

Start Time: 07:15:04.05
10k: 0:53:54
Half Marathon: 1:51:56
22.1 Miles: 3:14:09
FINISH: 3:58:30 PLACE 300
Gun Time: 3:59:16

I put up some pictures, but until the DSL gets installed you have to go here. (Sorry, I'm feeling a little lazy) For anyone thinking of running a marathon: Do not wear a Dolphins hat. For some reason, it makes people feel the need to yell, "Go Bears." Not very funny after 26 miles. And good news, Monica only beat me by 10 minutes.

Sunday, February 01, 2004

3:59:16! Puff Daddy and Dustin Hoffman have nothing on me. Well, Dustin Hoffman has the two academy awards...But today, I ran the Pacific Shoreline Marathon in just under 4 hours. That's 26.2 miles. The first 26 are always the hardest. Please do not be impressed. My marathon partner, Dr. Monica Fox ran the thing with the flu. I kept up with her for 19 miles, then she must have beat me by at least 20 minutes. I did, however, beat the barefoot man. (No joke). Also of note, I came in a good 10 minutes ahead of Minh Thai. I was almost unable to walk at this point, so I did not go back to check to see if it was the same Minh Thai, but the announcer said he was from San Marino...I think that was where he was from. For those of you who did not know me when I was 8, I used to be able to solve the Rubik's Cube...quite quickly, actually. Anyway, in the two Rubik's cube-a-thons (or whatever they called them) that I entered, he beat me by nearly a minute. How the tides have turned.

Thursday, January 22, 2004

By popular request, my first guitar lesson:

Beginning rock guitar was certainly beginning rock guitar. I think I was the only person in the class who had picked up a guitar before. I was a guitar master, having learned all the chords on page 4 of our book many years ago. There was an old left handed woman with a right handed guitar and a blue haired woman with a blue guitar. I never plan ahead like that. Our instructor has a penchant for playing Led Zeppelin and Pink Floyd. I think his favorite hobby is teaching us a chord, and then playing some classic rock song that uses only that chord. My guitar does not work that well.

Sunday, January 18, 2004

To everybody who did not want to go sailing today:
Nico and I happened upon a pod of migrating dolphins. Or maybe they weren't migrating. They definitely seemed interested in our boat, and I think they were intentionally bumping into us. Does anybody know how many dolphins make up a pod? Me either, but there were too many to count. Unfortunately, none of them could be described as showmen. They were unable to walk on their tails and unwilling to jump out of the water.

Wednesday, January 14, 2004

Do I dare blog at work? I was thinking that I would update my links...I think 80% of my traffic comes from these 2 pages, so now I am returning the favor. Please note, 1) I know how to spell "partial" and 2) Jenny has replaced Tricia as the "Other One".

Friday, January 09, 2004

I almost forgot: Thank you to Jenny, my very first donor to the boat fund. You are reserved a space in heaven. The rest of you cheapskates can donate by clicking Or if you missed that, right over there>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Oh, to be forgotten.

A one act play by Michael B. Lasko

For some reason, Nico and I are quite accustomed to being ignored in restaurants. All kinds of restaurants: Italian, Chinese, seafood, places with views, loud places, and on and on and on. Usually after we're finished eating, we end up alone in an empty corner waiting, and waiting, and waiting for the bill. Tonight we went out for some exotic Mid-Eastern fare, and I learned that the Lebanese can ignore you like no one else on Earth. We weren't just ignored, we were invisible. 30 or 40 minutes later, the sociology experiment got old and we walked up to the front to pay.

Friday, January 02, 2004

Whoo hoo! Last day at Crescent. Very productive day. Click here for hours of fun.