Mount Maunganui and dinner in a castle with Aussies (not at Mount Maunganui)

Favorite thing we did on the last NZ trip: Climbing Mount Maunganui (in the rain). I'm using the term "climbing" loosely. It's really more of a walking thing. The top of the mountain was in a cloud, but the views from halfway up were incredible...even in the rain. The resident sheep were somewhere between disinterested and happy to pose for photos.


Nicole says I took too many pictures of sheep. Hopefully, the 8 Aussies we met while staying at Lanarch Castle (in Dunedin, not Mount Maunganui), will not be viewing my blog. Over dinner, one of them told us his favorite Kiwi joke:

An Australian farmer was visiting a New Zealand farm. In the back paddock, he comes across the New Zealand farmer screwing a sheep. The Aussie yells, "Hey Mate--in my country we sheer our sheep!" The NZ farmer yells back, "GET STUFFED!! I'm not sharing this sheep with anybody!!!"

PS: This joke is at least a little funnier if you are aware that Aussies and Kiwis claim they cannot understand each other (due to the different accents).

Te Reo Maori Lesson #1

Alternative title: If I bought the place, I would probably tell my mother it's pronounced as a "W".



Just back from New Zealand reconnaissance mission. If you don't hear from me for a while, it's because I have swine flu.

Although smaller in scope than the last trip , there is still too much to write about at once. And I'm sick, jet-lagged, and hungry. So let's start with Whakatane.

Yes indeed, "wh" is pronounced as "f" in Maori. Go ahead, say Whakatane...it's fun. It was raining, so we didn't do much while we were there. The town reminded me of something you'd see in Hawaii...and they have an active (offshore volcano). That's all I know.

For $199 I will help you beat any speeding ticket.

Some of you may remember that I was issued a traffic citation on the tandem a couple of months ago. On moral grounds, I felt obligated to fight this injustice. I had my day in court today.

While waiting for my name to be called, I prepared an elaborate (and likely losing) defense:

1) Your honor, I have not been issued a ticket in the last 19 years of driving.
2) When we are on tandem bicycle, I obey nearly all traffic laws:
a) I never speed (pause for laughter)
b) I stop at red lights
c) I stay to the right (I had actually written down "left" in my notes...still dreaming about New Zealand.)
d) We use hand signals (I was having trouble deciding between "we" and "I" for all of the above.)
3) Occasionally, I check for other cars/bikes and just slow down at stop signs.
4) At the intersection in question: On a (signed) bike route in San Clemente, there was minimal traffic, and no cars approaching the intersection. I slowed down to about 8 MPH, saw that the intersection was clear, and continued through.
5) Something about Bill McCready's proper method. (I was thinking I would blame the stoker for pedaling us through while I tried to stop...)
6) Your honor, I've learned my lesson...I have not run a stop sign since. (This last point has made it impossible to ride with other cyclists--it is impossible to convince people who have not yet been hit with a $202 ticket that running a stop sign on a bicycle is a ticketable offense.)

As luck would have it, the ticketing deputy did not show up. Eight of us (including two other cyclists) had our cases dismissed. (The two other cyclists had been with a group of twenty. They claimed that they were at the front, and would have stopped, but they were getting bumped from behind. All twenty of them were issued citations.)

So after watching two hours of traffic cases, I am confident that I can beat any speeding ticket. Either that, or the defendants were so poor at defending themselves that the cops did not bring their A game. Please note: I said speeding ticket. There seems to be very little defense for any other moving violation (red light, stop sign, littering, marijuana possession).

Highly skilled repair of Sony DSC-T5

Alternative title #1 was: I've heard you can restart a human heart by the same method
Alternative title #2 was: That's 45 more dollars I can go and drink tonight

Yesterday, instead of taking pictures, our little Sony digital camera would show only a very blurry display and the following message: "E:61:10".

I searched all over the internet, and the consensus seemed to be:
1) Send it back to Sony for repair ($100-$150).
2) Drop it (from a height of somewhere between 2 inches and 3 feet).

As with many small electronic devices, the cost of repair was more than the value of the camera, so I chose option 2. Dropping a camera from a height of 2 inches is much more difficult than you might think; you will find yourself attempting to drop the camera gently to avoid breakage.

After about 3 or 4 tries (and a height of 6 inches), the camera is now working again.

And we want them running healthcare?

I Bond Earnings Rate 0.00%, Fixed Rate 0.10%
The earnings rate for Series I Savings Bonds is a combination of a fixed rate, which applies for the life of the bond, and the semiannual inflation rate. The 0.00% earnings rate for I bonds bought from May through October 2009 will apply for their first six months after issue. The earnings rate combines a 0.10% fixed rate of return with the -5.56% annualized rate of inflation as measured by the Consumer Price Index for all Urban Consumers (CPI-U). When the inflation rate is less than zero, a bond's earnings rate is less than its fixed rate (but the earnings rate is never less than zero). The fixed rate applies for the 30-year life of I bonds purchased during this six-month period. The CPI-U decreased from 218.783 to 212.709 from September 2008 through March 2009, a six-month change of -2.78%.

Who the hell is going to buy a savings bond paying 0% interest? And it only earns interest for 30 years...what happens after 30 years?

Favorite line spoken by attending physician whilst I was in pharmacy school:

Med Student: What did infectious disease doctors do before HIV?
Dr. Battiger: We grew cultured.

Spent last night at the symphony for Nico's birthday. In a couple of weeks, I get to go to the opera.

Too much culture for one month. I am glad these places have bars.

Published!!!

Most people do not have the will/desire to carry around a 4 pound camera on a bicycle trip.

The thirty+ tandem teams from our recent trip to New Zealand were invited to upload a dozen photos each (or was it two dozen?) to make a collective photo album. A local artist was then given the task of selecting the best photos (and cropping/finishing them) for inclusion in said album. I have not counted, but I believe 20 of my photos made the final cut.

In case that first link did not work, here's a link to the Santana Website.

Beware the Ides of April…

I am told I have picked up a few new readers, so I feel obligated to write something. I usually tell people that one can tell how busy I am at work by how frequent the posts appear. So, in case the reader had not noticed: I am still busy at work.

Also, there is not much going on that has been worthy of writing.

Some updates:

Yes, that last post was an April Fools joke.

No, the New Zealand thing was not a joke. Okay, the part about the sheep was a joke…I tried shearing a sheep in New Zealand, and did not have much affinity for it. The sheep kept flinching, which made me flinch, which resulted in a very poorly sheared sheep. I would require several years of training to make a living raising sheep.

But we really are considering a move to New Zealand. I will be writing the CAOP in June (they do not “take tests” in Kiwi), which requires a trip to Auckland (or London, or any city in Australia). To prepare for said exam, I have spent the last couple of weeks studying British therapeutics. Surprisingly, most of the book has been a review. (Surprising mostly because I do not remember ever opening a textbook whilst in pharmacy school.) I am waiting on a few more books which are being shipped from the far corners of the earth.

“Why New Zealand?” You ask...The copyrighted text below was borrowed from this book. Mr. Publisher: Please appreciate the free plug I have given your book…or at least send me a warning letter before suing me.

Dear friends,

It is with some sadness that I tender my resignation, effective immediately. After much inner probing, I have decided to accept a position with the American Panascope Corporation, and will soon begin overseeing development/production of a new generation of surgical tools.

I shall miss our building, and all of its inhabitants. I would miss the florescent lights, but I understand my new company has a pretty decent set.

With the time I have spent at Prescription Solutions, I leave here knowing that I can get the job...but can I do the job?

The worst day tandeming...

1) Planned weekend ride down to San Diego a few days too early (when the forecast called for 80 degrees of sunshine).
2) Issued traffic citation for running a stop sign in San Clemente. Yes, I was riding a bicycle, and I got a ticket. I hear it's a $205 fine. (I shouldn't complain that much, as I probably ran 30 stop signs before that one).
3) Had to stop at every stop sign for the remaining 60 miles to San Diego.
4) Developed excruciating pain in knees.
5) Too cold for giant tortoises to come out of their barn.
5) Next day: Horrible wind on the return ride; 10 miles in the rain. Ran over glass; big hole in tire. Had to change tube in the rain. [Having had enough of Amtrak (see numerous other posts), and because the Coaster does not run on Sundays, we decided to ride halfway home (to Oceanside), then catch Metrolink.]
6) Call from work during otherwise uneventful train ride to Santa Ana. In case you are wondering, a tandem fits fabulously on a Metrolink train. Your only potential obstacle might be navigating the bike through the station(s)...this is not a problem in either Oceanside or Santa Ana.
7) Sidewall blowout in Santa Ana; no more tubes. Stoker hopped on bus home; I got bored and kept walking...for 5 miles until stoker reappeared with the car.

On the bright side, we rode pretty close to 150 miles over 2 days, which might be a record for us. Ran into Grant (sans stoker) from New Zealand at the edge of Camp Pendleton...and then Grant bought us breakfast. Thanks Grant! [To clarify, Grant is from Carlsbad, not New Zealand. We just happened to meet him last month in New Zealand. The photo below is from the historical archive--I believe that's a blurry Bill McCready off to the right.]