To give you an idea of what a 67 room mansion looks like, 

here's Jancie thinking about trying the swing.

Central Hawke's Bay is mostly a place we drive through on the way to Wellington. I suppose that is a shame, as it does have many draws that would be popular if the same attractions weren't also available in many other parts of the country (like quaint towns, beaches, horseback riding, fishing, and sheep). On Sunday, however, we took a rare road trip to Central Hawke's Bay...Takapau to be more specific. The occasion: afternoon tea at Oruawharo Homestead.

A rare photo of Zooey actually doing something.

New Zealand is very much a coffee society. You can get a cappuccino (though you would probably order a flat white if you are Kiwi) at Burger King. We were a little disappointed when we first arrived here that there are few places serving afternoon tea. Fortunately, the owners of Oruawharo Homestead seem to enjoy serving it in their mansion.

Sorry, I have no pictures of tea. Jancie got bored of sitting very quickly and wanted to run around the vast grounds.

My eldest daughter has been very non-interested in my career thus far. Apparently, if something doesn't involve talking trains, talking cars, or singing penguins, it just doesn't rate on the Jancie scale. Naturally, I have thought of changing careers, perhaps becoming an engineer or an Antarctic ornithologist...I am getting on in years, and may have already missed my race car driving window.

Then I started thinking: Maybe I should return to my roots. We're headed back to Southern California in a few weeks. Jancie has never heard of Disneyland, but I am certain she wants to go. What could be more impressive than the guy who runs Captain EO?

Also, Disneyland has gotten unaffordable for all but richest Americans (and perhaps the world's richest foreign tourists); getting into Disneyland free is easily the best perk of working at Disneyland (followed closely by meeting your future spouse).

But then I started thinking: I quit that job because it paid so little. Will my daughter still respect me if I can't afford a set of souvenir mouse ears? And probably Nicole will want a matching set for Zooey. The math just does not work out.

Fortunately, there is a simple solution. Reopen the Upjohn Company Pharmacy. Yes, a pharmacy. Right there on Main Street, USA. Where could anyone find a better location for a pharmacy?

And so we are off on a new/old adventure. Goodbye to my Kiwi friends, coworkers, and other acquaintances. It has been a mostly pleasant 4+ years. Hello Disneyland, California.

Weekend in Hawke's Bay

Napier has so many public gardens, I often think my taxes should be higher. Here are Nicole, Jancie, and Zooey at the Bluff Hill Lookout, which might not quite qualify as a garden...

Above are Zooey learning to do something (back at home) and Jancie trying to catch a butterfly at the Centennial Gardens.

And in case you were wondering how to best spend two dollars:

Kiwi Wedding

Taking a self portrait requires a lot of skill when you do not

have a phone with a self facing camera.

Interesting thing about New Zealand dining: restaurants make no attempt to turn over tables. If you are a very slow eater, this feature is a good thing. If you like showing up places without reservations, you may be in for trouble. Even a restaurant that looks empty probably has at least one party for each table that night, so you will not be seated before anyone with a booking; and there are not very many places that keep wait lists, as it is likely the restaurant will close before anyone leaves.

My instructions were to photograph the bride before she

took her hair down. Mrs. Wakefield, you really messed

up the depth of field in this photo.

And so it goes with weddings. Hawke's Bay is blessed with many wineries offering beautiful places to get married. Apparently, when planning your special day, you get the entire day to work with. We arrived a little early (around 3PM) for what we thought was an afternoon wedding. We were pretty close to the first guests to leave (at around 10PM) because we started worrying about Zooey and Jancie, who were at home with their grandparents.

Other than the length, the only things I found unusual (as an American) about the wedding were: 1) Signing the marriage certificate in the middle of the ceremony and 2) A cheese cake; no, not a cheesecake, a cake made of cheese...tiered like a wedding cake. Blue cheese, brie...maybe cheddar for the base? Nicole was in cheese heaven.

Art Deco IV


Is this the coolest car ever? Yes, it's a Jaguar made of wood.


On to the important stuff: The official rules state that one cannot set up a gazebo for the Gatsby Picnic until Sunday morning at 6 AM. But those in the know get there sometime before 5 AM to claim the best spots. I woke up around 5, and was able to find a pretty respectable piece of real estate, and sure enough the cops came by around 5:40 and cautioned everyone about waiting to erect any structures for another 10 minutes. After going home to try sleeping for a couple of hours, I returned to find about a dozen gazebos blown away and destroyed by the wind. Fortunately, ours remained standing, but as the wind was continuing to build, I made the call to retreat to the more protected beach side of the treeline. My early morning was for naught.

It was still windy down by the beach, but we were able to picnic without too much damage. Nicole's work even got a mention in the local paper:

"One cheerful group had a sign "Drinks and Dollies" on their nifty nest..."

Now that's just all around poor reporting. We (mainly Nicole) built the Grauman's Chinese Theater, complete with hand/foot prints out front. Inside we were a silent movie (and everything was black and white, including the food). The wind prevented the screen and title cards from being displayed behind us, but otherwise the effect was pretty good. And all they notice is the sign (which is clearly a movie poster)? Did I mention there was free popcorn?

At the end of the day, we attempted to take an Art Deco Family portrait, but Jancie was not cooperating at all.

Weekend trip to Wellington for a baby naming

 Blogger keeps scrambling my hebrew text, so here are a couple of pictures (with English transliterations).

Sorry family, it did not appear to be the sort of synagogue that takes pictures of these sorts of things, so I have none. The next day there was a bat mitzvah, which we were invited to attend. It was not quite the American production I am used to, but there was a large (and somewhat exotic band), which allowed my old knees to show everyone that I can still kazatzka (again, sorry no pictures). The crowd was impressed, Jancie not so much.




And the day after that, we went to the zoo! This is  what Zooey looks like at the zoo.


Jancie appeared to have a much better time than her little sister. Her favourite animal is officially the giraffe. In case nobody else is keeping score, I called this one well over two years ago.

Jancie preferred the tiger statue to the real tiger.

And Shelly was trying to hook up with an African Spurred Tortoise (in the little pen behind Jancie), but apparently this particular species of tortoise does not like having its neck pulled. Note to Jancie: Shelly also does not like having her neck pulled.

Beach Day

Napier is a lovely seaside town, but the beaches are not the world's greatest. Forgive me if I wrote a post just like this one a few years ago. Last week, we went to Waipatiki, which is about 30 km north of us. In my opinion, Waipatiki is Hawke's Bay's most scenic beach.

Ocean Beach

30 km to the south gets us to Ocean Beach, where we spent a couple of hours on January 2nd. January 2nd is a public holiday here; nobody knows why, and it has no name except "the day after New Years." A holiday is a holiday, and I will take it. And January 2nd brought us to Ocean Beach, which though not as stunning as Waipatiki does have its own charm.

Here are Jancie and I returning from playing in the water shortly after Jancie decided playing in the water is not very much fun.

I did bring my surfboard to Ocean Beach. It was my first attempt at surfing in New Zealand; I won't bother to point out how long I've been in New Zealand, but let's just say I was not as sharp as I remember. I think I stood up for a total of 6 exhilarating seconds, hence there are no known pictures of me surfing at Ocean Beach.

Sleeping Beauty

If Ocean Beach does not feel like it is too far to drive to the beach (which it kind of does to me, in that we are on an island, and all), a further 10 km and we're at Waimarama. I had been dreaming of surfing for the last couple of days, and for some reason Nicole, Jancie, and Zooey were agreeable to yet another beach trip. Waimarama looks to me like what I think an East Coast (of the US) beach would look like if I had ever been to one. It looks extra crowded in all the photos I took because 1) it is crowded by New Zealand standards (the temperature hit 30 degrees Celsius in Napier today) and 2) there is so little sand above the high tide line that everybody is crammed together. Let's start with a photo of Zooey doing what she does best. And follow with a couple of pictures of Jancie; notice the beach full of sand, and Jancie wants to play with the boulders.

Waimarama did have the advantage (today, at least) of having a slow rolling swell, which allowed me to re-learn to surf. Sorry, there are no action shots; I am a surfing champion, and you will have to take my word for it. Here is a photo of me doing my best to look like I am on vacation.  Is anyone still wondering why I moved to New Zealand?

Best day ever

(Alternative title: Sandcastles in the Sand)

Actually, any day I don't have to work is a pretty good one. But since today is Christmas (and nothing is open), we headed to the beach. Going to the beach with two small children is more difficult than going to the beach without two small children. I had to choose between bringing my surfboard or a gazebo to protect my northern beauties from the sun. [Aside: A gazebo in New Zealand is like a tent without walls, and not something you might court your lover in if you were both starring in a Broadway musical.]

Zooey spent her first beach day the way she spends most days. Why yes, those are real alligators. If you ever get bored, I highly recommend going to an IZOD store and asking where they are keeping their alligators.

And then the crowds started to arrive.

The Kingdom of Jancie was destroyed shortly thereafter. History will likely note that while her short reign was the result of numerous factors, her fear of getting within three metres of the water tended to leave the castle(s) vulnerable to an attack by sea.




I almost forgot, there were these dolphins...which I suppose is not particularly unusual if you live near an ocean, but is still sort of a neat thing to see swim by. Unfortunately, I never seem to have the correct lens with me, so this is closest you will get to them.

Maui Dreaming

I just realized that our first trip to Hawaii predates our first digital camera. I was using a Pentax ME Super at the time and was never able to take particularly good photos with it; though after looking through the stack of prints, I was much better than was Nicole. I see that we liked living dangerously even before moving to New Zealand.

Speaking of living dangerously: There was this blowhole thing that shot water like a hundred feet into the air when a wave hit it right. This is as close as Nicole would get to it. Notice the expertise involved in setting up the photo. I then risked life and limb to get a little closer. Note: the effect of getting hit by a 100 foot wall of water is only slightly more pleasant than sitting in the front row of the Shamu Show at Sea World.

 

Nicole did manage to injure herself at the gentle Olivine Pools. The pools are very calm...except when suddenly they are not. Do not ever invade a country by sea with Nicole. A single wave will hit her, and she will be unable to move or speak. 

And finally: I had forgotten the Jeep was red. In my head, it was a boring beige colour. I first decided to move to Hawaii after returning the (only slightly) wrecked Jeep to the airport; all they said was, "Nobody wants that on their vacation." I kept expecting to receive a bill, but never did.

Zooey Pania Lasko (7 pounds 13 ounces; Born 12th October, 2013)



I am having so little luck photographing this baby. We (let's say Nicole) forgot to bring a camera that is not also a phone. Having only a camera phone would probably be okay, except we have really cheap phones. So I get a very kind coworker to bring in a pocket digital camera...somehow (I don't want to come out and blame Jancie directly), all the pictures got erased. So I go back today with the Sony. These were the best I could do.

Here are a couple of self portraits I tried to take with Jancie at the Hasting's Market while we were taking a break from the hospital. Janice will not drink milk, except with a spoon (like a weird dairy gazpacho). She will also not drink a white fluffy, except with a spoon. Which would be okay if the farmers' market had spoons. Drinking a white fluffy with a coffee stirrer is a time consuming process.